I was ANGRY.
I didn't know that I was ANGRY,
until I started talking to GOD
about a HURT in my HEART.
HURT is HURT
because
HURT HURTS.
And before you know it,
it can bleed into
ANGER
towards
whomever or whatever is the root to the HURT.
So I talked to GOD about being
ANGRY.
And that HURT, as I don't want to be ANGRY.
But ANGER is real.
Is it okay to be ANGRY?
"Be angry [at sin—at immorality,
at injustice, at ungodly behavior],
yet do not sin; do not let your anger
[cause you shame, nor allow it to]
last until the sun goes down"
(Ephesians 4:26).
Now that is a hard stop.
A good hard stop
to not let ANGER get you!
The tears flowed,
washing away the residue of
the ANGER
as I refused its presence,
as
GOD'S WORD
came flowing from my mouth
as I reclaimed who I am IN CHRIST.
"I am PATIENT.
I am KIND.
I DO NOT ENVY.
I DO NOT BOAST.
I am NOT PROUD.
I DO NOT DISHONOR others.
I am NOT SELF-SEEKING.
I am NOT EASILY ANGERED.
I DON'T KEEP RECORDS OF WRONGS.
I DO NOT DELIGHT IN EVIL
but REJOICE with THE TRUTH"
(from I Corinthians 13:4-6).
Oh how I AM these things
IN CHRIST,
because
there is no way I can be any of these
without CHRIST.
As I spoke these words to my heart,
I was refusing all the negativity in my soul.
The ANGER washed away.
The HURT was HEALED.
Because HIS LOVE OF FORGIVENESS
washes it ALL away.
This is who I always want to be.
Will I always
REACT
patiently,
kindly,
not envious,
not boastful,
not proud,
not dishonoring others
not self-seeking,
not easily angered,
not keeping records of wrong,
not delighting in evil
always rejoicing with the truth,
when I am HURT?
I wish,
as this is the desire of my heart,
but it is impossible in my own power
as I am way too human.
BUT that is why I have to
ABIDE IN JESUS
and not in my FEELINGS.
So you got to see the ugly side of Joni.
The real Joni who struggles with being human.
But thanks be to
GOD for
HIS GRACE
that washes over me,
that washes over you,
because of
THE LOVE OF JESUS
that bled from the CROSS.
I was deeply reminded of
HIS GREAT LOVE
in the depths of my great HURT,
of
ALL who I AM in
CHRIST.
Less of me, MORE of HIM.
Thank YOU JESUS
for being my
"ALL IN ALL"
(listen to the song below)
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